A relationship breakdown can knock the confidence of even the most resilient among us. Whatever the causes or circumstances of a partnership ending, it can lead us down a negative path of self-doubt, self-blame and deep and painful feelings of unworthiness. If we find our marriage on the rocks, or we're ghosted after just a few dates with someone we felt chemistry with, we can turn inwards, questioning what we did wrong, and giving ourselves damaging messages about our value and worthiness of love.
“I began to look very differently at my failures and I began to see that each one taught me something so valuable about who I was and what I wanted going forward,” says Elizabeth. “Each one had been a lesson wrapped up in a mistake. A nudge from the universe in a slightly different direction.”
Having shared her own failures, and those of so many others, she now sees failings as “beautiful journeys of discovery”, which we think is a lovely way to think about past regrets.
While this viewpoint doesn’t lessen the pain of a regret or a failure, there is comfort to be taken in the fact that everyone fails, and those failures can teach us so much, and open up the path for greater truth, courage, knowledge, and, most importantly, love.
“All of us fail in myriad ways almost every single day and yet we live in an age where it’s really difficult to be honest about failure. We live in an age of curated perfection because of social media,” says Day.
“When we choose to be open and honest about that vulnerability that's when we become our strongest. However bleak it feels, however much you think you have failed, cling on that little bit longer because the real failure might be not finding out what happens next.”